![]() ![]() What could have been a long, tense drive ended up with the whole family singing a medley of songs, arriving at our holiday cottage wailing Ten Green Bottles like the Von Trapps. He didn’t say anything, but kept looking at me quizzically and, dare I say it, happily. Undeterred, and with the car steadied, I tried again. So, two hours into the drive from our home in London, I started my ‘Be Nice’ mission and did something very out of character: I reached over and put my hand on Colin’s knee. Ten days in Cornwall was the perfect opportunity to try it. But being nice to Colin, though easy in theory, would take effort and, like many women up to their eyes in work and children, it was down there with ‘cleaning out the goldfish bowl’ on my to-do list.Īnd yet . . . our holiday was looming. Of course, things were different in our parents’ time. What love had I given to Colin of late? I recalled my teenage years, watching my mother serve my father dinner every evening at 6pm, after taking his jacket as he walked in from work, pouring him a drink and asking about his day.īy contrast, I often seemed to greet Colin by barking at him for being late, then insisting he take out the bins and recycling before he sat down for dinner. ![]() Recently, psychologist Oliver James told me: ‘Lauren, the amount of love you give is equal to the amount of love you receive.’ One piece of advice ran like a seam through every interview: be nice to your other half. My job as a freelance writer meant I was used to asking psychotherapists and authors for their secrets on how to conduct a successful relationship. Somehow, over six years of marriage, work, two young sons, iPhones, chores and exhaustion had driven a wedge between us. I once drove 50 miles to Kent, where he lived, just to kiss him goodnight. In our courting days, I’d go giddy with excitement after every phone call and surprise him with expensive dinners at top restaurants just because he appreciated good food. Yet, not so long ago, I’d adored this man. Just be nice: Lauren Libbert decided to save her marriage by being kind to her husband ![]()
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